Top 10 Government Agents
Sometimes the lone hero bit doesn’t work. Sometimes there is someone with a plan, and someone who carries it out. Sometimes, you need an agent. Here are the Top 10 characters who carried out their orders like a pro.
10. Leon Kennedy: He may have started out as a rookie cop, but fighting zombies for ten years will apparently get you quite a boost in your pay grade. When he was assigned to protect the President’s (incredibly annoying) daughter, Leon stopped being a rouge zombie-killer, and started working for the Stars & Stripes. Outfitting him with a sweet attaché case, stylish fur-and-leather jackets and an upgradeable handgun, the President really went out of his way to make Mr. Kennedy feel like part of the family. Also, who else was going to Europe to rescue his daughter from those freaking zomb—excuse me, Los Ganados.
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9. James Bond: If only this list had come out in 1998, old Jamesy might have been a little higher on it. Unfortunately, the rest of his games were lackluster and a whole new slew of video game agents have stepped up to take his place. However, this British spy still has enough clout to make the cut. Who else can get an instant-kill Golden Gun? Who else carries a wristwatch laser? What other square-headed spy could steal our hearts like that man? Nobody. That’s who. And by the way, enough with the crappy remakes of Goldeneye and the sad attempts at re-catching the glory days; it’s just not working. I’ll just pull out my N64.
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8. Master Chief: An obvious avatar of the government’s will, Master Chief embodies everything a inter-galactic governing body could want: he’s quiet, strong and able. He can get the job done, and he doesn’t need back-up or fancy theatrics. Just give him a few plasma grenades and he’s good. Granted, I’m not really sure what Master Chief’s role in the Army is, or even where exactly a Master Chief falls into the hierarchy, but I know I enjoying obliterating the Covenant with him, and that’s good enough for me.
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7. Commander Shepard: We act like Shepard is the hero of Mass Effect, but as any true expert knows, it’s really Admiral Hackett who is running the show. You can’t travel 3 light-years without him telling you what to do in the first one, he introduces you to the Arrival DLC in ME2, and you spend the whole third game reporting to him. Shepard is first and foremost a soldier, in service to the Alliance Military. Never forget that. You have to admit, though; he gets things done. He is at his best when he is performing tasks for his superiors. It’s when he starts thinking on his own when the trouble starts.
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6. Agent 47: Before you say that Agent 47 isn’t “technically” a government agent, let me learn you: Agent 47 is employed by the International Contract Agency. Though not a political body, the ICA does partner with the FBI, M16 and the U.N. for many of their contracts, thus making their agents (like 47) agents of the governing body that assigned the contract. In this sense, Agent 47 is the ultimate government agent; he doesn’t serve just one government, he serves them all. Also, he is really good at killing people in creative and fun ways. So that’s cool.
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5. Spy (Team Fortress 2): To what ends does the deviously sneaky spy serve? What higher power has inserted him into the ever going war between Red and Blue? Who is his true master? Alas, these are questions that may never be answered, due in part to the fact that A) We can’t catch him alive, or B) The Heavy keeps killing him. Either way, he’s a real bastard. You get the sense playing Team Fortress 2 that, even though it is undeniably a team game; the Spy is always in it for his own ends, rather than the need for the team. I don’t trust him…or you. Just thinking about him is making me paranoid.
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4. Sam Fisher: Sam Fisher doesn’t give a f**k. If that isn’t his motto, it should be, Because it’s true: Sam Fisher is a tool without feelings. He can, and will, do anything that is needed to serve his master. And when things take a turn for the worse in Splinter Cell: Conviction, he stops being a puppet and somehow manages to give 89% less of a f**k than before. Those are numbers you can’t argue with. But he is at his most effective when he is protecting the country by doing one thing: Whatever his bosses tell him too.
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3. Mike Haggar: Mike Haggar isn’t just a government agent. He is the government. Not taking his role as Mayor of Metro City lightly, he decides to fight crime the old fashioned way: by using his wrestling background to pile drive thugs on his own streets. He has my vote. Few political figures have the audacity to take a stand against evil in quite the fashion that Haggar does, but one must always remember his driving motivation: Making the world a better place for us to live. And rescuing his daughter. That too.
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2. Captain Price: Video games have seen some bad-asses in their day, but Captain Price stands head-and-shoulders above most of them. He has survived two world wars, a Russian gulag and had to deal with a soldier named Soap. He’s pretty much the man. Taking the “capable soldier” routine to the extreme, Price has made sacrifice after sacrifice to ensure the safety of our country and all of its inhabitants. You can insert all the British sillynanny jokes you want, but at the end of the day there are few soldiers I would want on me team rather than Captain Price.
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1. Snake: The consummate soldier. Never told the full story, never receiving the praise he deserves, giving up everything he loves for the sake of freedom: these are the qualities that make Snake the ultimate government agent. He has spent his whole life fighting an unseen enemy, and he doesn’t even know why (or at least I don’t.) Rarely have we seen his like; never shall we see it again. Snake embodies everything that you could want in a soldier, and for that receives the number one spot.
